Saturday, March 22, 2014

Watch your mouth, son!

Keep your friends close, and your words even closer. Little can hurt you or others more than a few (or many) ill-placed words. As a whole, we do a lot of talking. Out loud, in our heads, on social media, blogging, etc. We are expressed through our words. So, why do so many of us lack the ability to talk and communicate well?
Perhaps its because we can put exactly what we are thinking up on the internet for the world to see. Let me repeat what has been said before: just because you can, doesn't mean you should. When asked for a super power, people will often say 'the ability to read minds' Why? The human mind has a lot of not-so-nice corners in it that people don't want others to see, justifiably so. We judge people, we worry, we obsess, we struggle with addiction, temptations, all very secretively in our heads. There is no need to tell the whole world of these struggles. Talk to your loved ones, of course, if needed. But people do not need to know of a mean thought you had or that something tempted you. Just like how we can choose our actions, based on our thoughts, we can choose our words as well.
So how do we express our minds politely, truthfully and intelligibly, and talk like a human to another human? First of all, speaking and expressing yourself through words should not sound like your mind is running off to heavens knows where, with your filter having been equally lost in the great unknown. Coffee doesn't taste good until it goes through the filter; your words will sound better if you filter them first as well. Pick and choose your words and use the ones that show that you are, indeed, blessed with a brain. Second, don't instruct people unless its your job or place to. When you do need to give orders or even express frustration at someone, realize they are just like you. Literally, just like you. That thing called feelings, that hurt when people speak carelessly or maliciously? Yes, they have them too. If your place is to instruct, or someone frustrates you, try not to speak out of pride but a desire to better the other and the situation. Furthermore, words can express love, admiration, excitement, etc. Thus, mean what you say. Do you really admire that person? Do you really love that person? At least when it comes to anger, honesty is normally mixed in with the raging fury. Lying is too easy with words, especially words of flattery. I can say all these nice things to your face and not mean a lick of it. Doesn't mean its right but I can still do it, and get on your good side, then swipe out your knees and BAM... I have, unfortunately, hurt you, possibly grievously. Don't do that to others and beware of that tendency in others. All words should always involve a respect for other person and for yourself.
Thus, words are a way we relate to the world as a whole. My challenge for you today is to think about how you are being represented to the world through your words. Are you understandable? Approachable? Fake? Pushy? Is there a way of saying it better, that will not sacrifice your happiness or that of others?


Pacem

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